mienai hope

the title 'mienai hope' actually means 看不见希望. din really had a good sleep, but flashes of images went thru my mind, not sure whether its dream or my thoughts, cant differentiate them anymore. this morning when i wake up, the sunlight no longer shine on my face, as i noe 我已离希望很遥远了.

and because of sum of my foolish actions, confusion caused, things have change, unable to return to wat it used to be. i have never believe in fortune tellers, but now, after losing all my belief, i suddenly wanna go and consult 1. i dunno the whether izzit the truth or lies, whether izzit the good or the worse, but i juz wanna an answer for my life, be it comforting or worsening. suddenly, a phrase started to resurface on my mind, 'why give me sugar when you have already feed me poison'. history repeat itself i guess, it was like this 5 yrs ago, now, the same things still happen. i cant get wat u said off my mind. im really tired of this life, a life with responsibilities yet no purpose.

a fren once told me, i seriously need some belief and a person to heal me, or shud i say my heart. juz when i tot i can have some quiet time at home, suddenly found out alot guests will be coming later in the afternoon, well i guess the next best thing is to for me to get lost. i guess i will be walking aimlessly outside later. im sorry, but a fade smile is all i can put up.

waiting for you, waiting for you to come here to my dream.